Have you ever been in a situation where you went to, say a bar, and then unexpectedly – or not, you see a girl you like, but at that moment you are not ready for a relationship, you only want a swinging partner? I bet you might find yourself being a fix in such a scenario because while you don’t want to hurt her feelings by telling her your mind, you also want her. It even gets worse if she’s into you at that first meeting. So, how do you tell someone bluntly, that you only want a “friend-with-benefits” and nothing more? Well, that is the purpose of this article.
But before we get into the real thing, there are a few things you need to know. First, you need to understand that taking the steps outlined in this article requires some tactfulness on your part, and maybe the ability to communicate your desire bluntly without any remorse. Much has been said, let’s get into it already!
- Be upfront about it.
First, you need to be honest at the very beginning. Instead of leading her on and pretending as if you want a committed relationship with her, you need to be sincere about the relationship and open up to her. Letting her know what your intention is for the relationship will allow her ample time to think about it and tell you whether she wants the same thing or not. A great way of communicating this is by sitting with her and starting with something like “I’m really enjoying our times together, but I’m not ready for a relationship…..” so, if she’s good with that she’ll let you know, and if not, you end the fling there. Another great way of doing this is by asking her what her intentions are. And although this might destabilize her, if she wants the same thing she’ll be more than welcome to let you know.
- Don’t ask her so much about herself
Albeit that you still need to know at least a little about the girl you want to hook up with, you should try as much as possible to limit the familiarity. While you need to be as amiable or cordial as you can, it shouldn’t go beyond that. This is because getting too intimate in your conversations will almost certainly build up some form of chemistry or bonding necessary for commitment. However, you shouldn’t hold yourself back from making the conversation sensual so as to let her know your intention.
- Let her know through TEXT
If you aren’t able to tell her to her face, you can do it through text. Because many people are more comfortable and sincere via SMS or chats, telling her your intentions through text message will give her ample time to think about it and respond. And If you are lucky she may share your desire.
Just to sum it all up, telling a girl that you only want to hook up with her may not be easy for either party, but starting on a sincere ground will lessen the trouble.